mis niñas son totalmente impresionante

A-man very pleased with the UEFA result, though mighty condolences to the Metzelder / Tiny B contingent. Love the Centerbacks. Spanish too dreamy for those logical Germans. Like watching circus of the stars out there, with stapleguns. The new TV makes for a legendary viewing experience, and we will only watch broadcasts that involve Scottish announcers. They say things like "decent purchase" and "not the innovation he plotted for". Anyways. Back to baseball.

Busy, busy week at the McKenna ranch and organ sweatshop. Grandparents McKenna finally met the little lady. Pretty spectacular. Lots of firsts logged.

Managed a preview at Marlow. Baby well behaved, though we did pull an AARP, I think dad ordered off the lunch menu.

Conditioned to resist the Paparazzo. Love the lid. And check those massive mitts, piano ready.


A thousand thanks to the Beavers for the air cover weeks 1-2.

Zonked in the torture chair...this leg thing is pretty wicked.

Gads, first bath. Amazing what a little Palmolive can do when effectively dished out.

Seconds before the accident. Stink eye, literally.

First turn in the sling. This ended comically.

Big viewing on Sunday. Baby Jane waited exactly until the last guest left to pull the pants off / rants up. Uncle Buster and Auntie Bishop controlling tempo:


And finally, the McKennas! Mom looks like a hand grenade wen off two inches from her left ear, which is mildly accurate.


The folks are off to the Beaverkill this week, back Friday for the weekend. Many projects on the docket. Good luck with the trouts pops!

The Simple Life

Feeling a lot of pressure to deliver pictures here, tonight we'll see the film snaps I took while skipping about like a forest elf moments after delivery. Can't imagine we'll hit paydirt with that load, but will post anything that looks moderately noble. Beav made me shoot everything in B&W, you know, to accentuate the gritty labor room politics.

The baby Jane is is not shy about the feeding. She's gained back her birth weight inside of a week, and is looking to crush some personal bests set by her father in the early 70's. She's also graduated to these fancy cassocks, excellent for cloaking the over-fill.

The routine.

Dairy daze, anticipation building....


Moments after the milk truck splits...


Officially milk drunk:


What you don't see here is phase IV, diaper party. NSFW. Apologies for the hard hitting facts, but this is the only phase I really get to add value during, so pretty exciting for pops.

She and I managed 3/4 of Gladiator last night. Didn't dig the Joaquim, gave Crowe two knuckle sucks and fist pass.

The McKennas hit town Saturday morning, should be hi-jinks. Mom doesn't know it's a secret Catholic christening! Rented out the Polish Party Hall, whole nine.

Every Holy Swaddle

Daddy got served his party release papers last night and went to see POLVO at the Bowery with his wilding friends. Epic performance, capped the greatest week of my life (a close second being the week I got tossed from Key Club and worked the Jaycee Spook Trail with the bum urine and Yeti wig).

I rocked out so hard the girls had to outfit me with the toile boppy this morning to support my neck.

Grandma McKenna is getting royally anxious to meet the chooch. They are a week out. In the meantime, we are training the beanser to fetch beers and look cute when guests come over. To that end, Uncle Hawes made a special appearance on Friday, bearing treats. This bottle of wine is the same vintage of my seersucker suit, and almost as delicious:
Jane saves her gas face for the witching hours. She's all roses for show and tell.

No baby blog would be complete without the gratuitous daddy and baby sleeping shot. Sadly, daddy doesn't do the mummy very angelically. He just handles repose like a Gilla Monster and smells like diaper.


Mom, however, continues to keep us well provisioned in the beauty department.


The hand model agent said we have a candidate. Unfortunately, we keep those strapped to her sides at all times. She has escape artist talent.


So serious, this one. Probably doing quadratic maths upstairs.

Back to work tomorrow. Should be shock and Awww.

Jane of the Waking Universe

Learned about the five "s's" today:

Swaddle
Sideways
Shush
Swing
Suck

If you bat for the cycle, the little lady is supposed to go down el foldo. I would offer my own version of the five:

Spit up party!
Somebody's hungry face
Serious diaper issue
Soccer time with daddy 4AM
Stroll me mister

We are totally kicking it at 88 India. Windsor, Grandma Beaver and I put up the wall of rock on the nursery wall exterior, feels like we're ready for poker night already.

Baby is all about traffic signals. This one means colon go.


Taco Tuesdays.

Sometimes you just have to take pictures of them to remind you that it really happened. My menthol peanut...

When I was this age, I was banana yellow and had double eye patches.




Took our first spin around the neighborhood in the pram. Had my first beer with baby in tow. This thing will be great for smuggling sixers in McCarren Park Pool.


Dad may get his magic TV tomorrow.

Somebody tell Mary Jane she has a niece.

xoxoxoxoxo

We're home

Having spent her first three days on 11B room 77, Jane Windsor was discharged this evening, we're home and about to dominate some lasagna. Cabin fever had kicked in big time, at one point last night, we were watching the Apollo 11 lunar orbit, drinking accidentally frozen cranberry juices, and waxing about which of the Bryce cheese selection to crush first. Everyone knows everything about everyone's particulars now.

Dad has learned a lot of crazy stuff about babies in a hurry, and still feels like this project is just getting underway. We probably spieled with 11 nurses while in the hospital, got 11 different versions of how this works. I give my swaddle a C -.

Everyone is very happy, and very tired. When Jane goes down now, there's no stirring her till she's hungry again. Which is often. I'm now feeding every 2.5 hours, mostly nuts and berries.

Mom is radiant and running the household from the poop deck, Grandpa Beaver - who has coined himself "M.O." - and Grandma Beaver are ably taking care of the McKennas. Thank heavens.

We've received an awful lot of well wishes, thanks everyone for checking in. I'll get back to you before her first birthday, promise.

I give you, the ladies of 88 India:











Apologies for that last one, I kind of let my shit slip on the getting ready for pictures front. Can't figure out who she favors yet, but she's definitely got some A-tics. And the Beaver dimple.

Nothing but naps tomorrow.

xoxoxoxox

Miss Jane Windsor McKenna

I imagined this post would be both mightily witty and profound, but all I really want to do is get the pictures posted for those who couldn't be here to share our little delivery with us. It is all about the baby, and we now have one. Thank you mom, thank you dad, thank you dear Beavers, thanks doc.

Introducing Miss Jane Windsor McKenna. 7.9 lbs. 20.5 inches, born Friday the 13th, 23.23 in Roosevelt hospital, NYC. She is perfect and gorgeous. Knee weakening qualities. She has long skinny legs, dark hair and wrinkly fingers (like her mom).

Mom is doing brilliant, and far tougher than anyone I've ever tangled with. Dad practically delivered the Jane Bug, and is content just watching his beautiful girls feed one another. Those of you not yet fathers imagining yourselves "chilling" behind mom while pushing and things happen, cancel.

She's less than a day old now, and I'm watching her snooze from the couch in our recovery room. Pause, actually, I just changed my first diaper, solo.

Here's how it shook out.

On the way to the delivery room, we're all smiles here. 5:50AM, Friday morning.


Mom in labor, looks easy!

THIS IS THE FIRST PICTURE OF THE JANEBUG EVER.


Meet the chooch!

Dedicating this one to Mrs. Harkey.

This morning. This pic taken from the hospital utility annex, where we were temporarily sequestered. Home of the busted black and white TV. It was touch and go there for a bit. Big day to have babies in NYC. Think on it, we just had a baby in NYC. Nuts.

We almost named her Shecky Proudfoot:

Or Winstress Churchill.

Aces.

Once we were moved to the posh unit, we set up shop. SJ in the pocket, a natural.

The happy Beavers, buying stocks and making trades. xoxoxoxoxoxo.

Uncle Hawes, came with home made hawes fried chicken. Lady Jane is a series of drumsticks, currently.



Uncle T and Aunt Biz dropped by. Those guys are pros and former residents here. A thousand snaps for the luxe goodie bag, this unit is absurdly well provisioned. We are impossibly lucky on all fronts.


Time for another diaper change. Will post more foolery in the morning maybe.

Could also be time to raid the medicine cabinet.

This post goes out to Josh B. and Tiny B. Let's make Christmas hilarious in a hurry.

God bless,

A + W + J

Chooch's Brooklyn Digs

Finally, the wall was finished and we were able to properly appoint our little girl's room here in Greenpoint. The R.A. Miller "Blow Oskar" hanging above the crib was a Christmas present from Austin after I told him I was thinking of red & white for decor. The other space above the crib is reserved for a special quilt coming from Mama Beav soon....

Here's the "changing corner". Gorgeous poster courtesy of Sara & Seth- works perfectly there. The watercolors are Harrison Haynes originals, and the ladybug mobile is a gift from Mama Beav (when you pull the peg at the bottom, the wings flap!).

Here are the famous cowboy boots from Grandma McKenna- these were a huge hit at the Charlotte shower. She also gave us the lion....

And finally, the corner bookshelves— a middle-of-the-night stroke of genius. All the wonderful toys and books she's already been given are proudly on display- Love the giant chicken from Biz and the girls. Please note: Top shelf reserved for Beavers only!
Its just about the tiniest room ever—we've actually seen friends who have turned closets into their baby's room- and those are bigger! But it will do. Austin walked in there the other night and said the only thing missing is a Chooch! How true. xo, Winz